Topic: Please help! Advice needed.

[Shinobi]

Hi,

I've been browsing this forum for a long time and this is my first post. I'm currently in the final stages of my ROTP application and am facing a serious issue I would really appreciate some guidance regarding it. I have browsed every page of "the home front" category and have been unable to find a post relating specifically to my circumstance.

My case is as follows: I am awaiting an offer for Infantry officer and am also interested in Intelligence officer if selected. The problem is that I have a long term girlfriend and marriage is a definite possibility in our near future. We both currently live in the greater Toronto area and have intentions of eventually starting a family together. However, she is currently finishing her degree and wants to buy a house and start her career soon. Also, she has family living here and does not want to move further than southern Ontario.

This presents obvious problems for my career ambitions in the CF. Living apart for extended periods of time (not deployments but training, unit posting, etc) is a real issue. Aside from living away from family I imagine there would be other complications with her having to switch jobs and not being able to settle in a house for any substantial period of time.

Has anyone been in a similar situation and how do your spouses cope in regards to switching civilian jobs in a professional career?

Thanks for taking the time to read my post and any suggestions/advice is much appreciated!

[PPCLI Guy]

After two wives and 14 moves, I can tell you this: you will move, and it will be outside of Southern Ontario, irrespective of which Regiment you are assigned to.  Although regulations currently permit you to report for a posting without your family, I firmly believe that this option will be more tightly controlled in the future.  Either your wife agrees to these conditions, or you should look for another profession.  It really is that simple.

As to coping, plenty of people in the Forces have spouses who manage to have a fulsome career that reflect the fact that Officers have to move more frequently than NCMs, but it comes with its own set of challenges.

You need to both go into this with your eyes wide open.